DVD: STRANGE WILDERNESS

Directed by: Fred Wolf

Written by: Fred Wolf, Peter Gaulke

Starring: Steve Zahn, Allen Covert, Jonah Hill, Justin Long, Kevin Heffernan, Ashley Scott, Peter Dante, Harry Hamlin, Robert Patrick, Joe Don Baker, Ernest Borgnine

Distributed by Paramount Pictures & Happy Madison Productions

Available at Amazon for $19.99 RIGHT NOW.

Not yet available on DVD in the U.K.

Review by Ray DeRousse

FILM:

DVD:

I am barely going to bother with any sort of formal review for STRANGE WILDERNESS. Even eternal life would not give me enough life worth wasting to construct the two sentences needed to cover this absolutely worthless piece of shit-stained celluloid.

THE “FILM”

The story, which could be written with room to spare on the flagella of a defective sperm cell, involves the host of a once-popular wildlife show attempting to film Bigfoot in order to save the show from cancellation. This matters little, though, since it is only the flimsiest of set-ups in order to bring the slack-jawed masses a series of pot jokes and dick jokes and gay jokes.

Almost every single thing fails in this film. The direction and editing - and I’m only guessing that there were actual people manning these departments - are beyond incompetent, completely ruining several promising moments of hilarity with hideous cutaways. The written dialogue is atrociously dull, but then again, the improvised “hilarity” leaves much to be desired as well. And every single performance in this film deserves to be shown back to them once a year for the rest of their lives in order to prevent it from happening again. Even fucking Jonah Hill, who is a terrific young comedian, is destroyed in this film.

I’ll give you one example. The single, solitary potential for laughter in this film involves Jonah Hill singing a hate-filled song to his family on acoustic guitar. Many of us watched a clip of this and laughed, because it is fairly funny on its own. Yet, in the film, it’s chopped up and intercut so badly that the entire effect of the song is ruined. DISASTROUS. It’s never a good sign when the best scene in your movie is better in a different form on the internet.

God I hate this movie. I cannot believe this film made it past the “I just had a funny idea while taking a shit” stage.

EXTRAS

These are even worse. The so-called behind-the-scenes extras involve long, uncut takes of Jonah Hill and JUSTIN LONG goofing around on the set as technicians mill around him. They didn’t even try to put anything together, or edit it into a digestible form; they just took the film from the camera, and put it on the DVD. And it’s not even funny.

Included also is a REEL COMEDY television segment that looked at the stars of the movie. All it does is reinforce the impression that these guys don’t have two brain cells between them all. Star STEVE ZAHN acts like he has either had a huge bong hit, or has had some major head trauma. What an utter waste of fucking time.

OVERALL

An absolute disgrace. Guys, I am sure you had a blast making this movie. But let me tell you something … it’s definitely not fun for the other 6.5 billion people who were not there with you, and absolutely no fun whatsoever for the three or four people who paid for this shit in the theaters.

Avoid this disc entirely if you love life and happiness. A disgrace to the motion picture industry … and yes, I’m including porn.

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