(Originally posted on The Rec)
Every single newspaper, blog, internet movie site, and drooling vegetable on planet Earth has listed their picks for the Oscar race this year. Even Chris threw his two tarnished cents into the ring right here.
The problem I have with creating a list of my picks is that the nominees, for the most part, are WRONG. In a perfect world, the winners would look something like this: Best Picture
“Children of Men” – Simply the best picture of the year. Any film with the two most mind-bending sequences filmed in the last ten years deserves the Oscar. End of story.
“Pan’s Labyrinth” – Fuck foreign language. This is a masterpiece in any language.
“The Queen”
“United 93″ – Searing and unforgettable. Should have been nominated.
“Letters From Iwo Jima”
Best Actor
Sacha Baron Cohen,”Borat” – An absolute crime that this performance was overlooked in the nominations. Hands down a brilliant comedic performance so complete that it consumed American culture for half of the year.
Leonardo DiCaprio, “The Departed” – This talented actor is nominated for “Blood Diamond,” probably due solely to that horrible accent. His work here is much stronger.
Ryan Gosling, “Half Nelson”
Peter O’Toole, “Venus”
Forest Whitaker, “The Last King of Scotland”
Best Actress
Helen Mirren, “The Queen” – What can I say? Magnificent. They got one right.
Kate Winslet, “Little Children”
Judi Dench, “Notes on a Scandal”
Penelope Cruz, “Volver”
Ivana Baquero, “Pan’s Labyrinth” – Spellbinding work as Ophelia. Her eyes alone emote more than any other actress not nominated.
Best Supporting Actor
Jackie Earle Haley, “Little Children” – I bet this one comes in. Awesome performance by a guy that had a lot of potential even as a kid.
Djimon Hounsou, “Blood Diamond”
Mark Wahlberg, “The Departed”
Sergi Lopez, “Pan’s Labyrinth” – Horrible mistake. Alan Arkin’s performance was a one-note “dirty old man” routine. This performance by Lopez is one to savor for the ages. Brutal, cold, calculating, yet strangely sympathetic.
Michael Caine, “Children of Men” – Stunningly endearing performance. Criminally overlooked.
Best Supporting Actress
Jennifer Hudson. “Dreamgirls” – This will probably happen, too. She gives an inspirational performance, one almost as talked about as Cohen’s Borat.
Cate Blanchett, “Notes on a Scandal”
Abigail Breslin, “Little Miss Sunshine”
Adriana Barraza, “Babel”
Maribel Verdu, “Pan’s Labyrinth” – You may not find a more complex performance onscreen by a supporting actress this year. She loses to Hudson only because Hudson’s role is more crucial to the effect of the movie.
Best Director
Alfonso Cuaron, “Children of Men” – Stark, unforgiving, and revolutionary. Out of the films of 2006, this is the one that will be studied in film classes in twenty years. Terrible injustice to be overlooked.
Clint Eastwood, “Letters from Iwo Jima”
Martin Scorsese, “The Departed” – He doesn’t deserve the award, folks.
Paul Greengrass, “United 93″
Guillermo Del Toro, “Pan’s Labyrinth” – Astonishing direction, beautifully shot and edited. If not for Cuaron’s work, this would win.
There you have it, kids. The Oscars the way they should be, if there was any justice in a system bought and sold by the studios with the biggest checkbooks.
8 Comments
I was astounded that Children of Men didn’t get more recognition. I think we may be surprised at some of the results tomorrow night. It’ll make Marisa Tomei winning for My Cousin Vinny look utterly predicatable.
@ Joe: Yeah, pretty astonishing and disappointed about “Chilren of Men.” I guess its “British” slant gave it a disadvantage. The Oscars are definitely biased against any films not exclusively American (see “Pan’s Labyrinth”)
Some good picks there, and it truly was criminal that Michael Caine didn’t get nominated for Children of Men. Although I really didn’t love that film as much as most.
On Pan’s Labyrinth… it’s a big shame it got overlooked in a lot of categories although I do think it’s a shoe-in that it will win both Original Screenplay and Foreign Language Picture.
What about Sergi Lopez for Best Actor? He was well worthy of a shout for his portrayal of Captain Vidal, the Facist Spanish Captain in Pan’s.
I have Lopez under Best Supporting Actor – he was not really a lead actor in “Pan’s Labyrinth.” Read the fine print, Matty :)
I find it curious that you consider DiCaprio’s accent horrible, particularly in light of the fact that every native of Rhodesia/Zimbabwe I talked to – about eight all told – said that he did a very good to excellent job. In any case, I loved both films, but felt that his perfomance in BD was better due not to the accent he had to affect but due to his character’s rather chameleon-like change of persona; does he really have a change of heart? I personally don’t think so.
Also rooting for Jackie Earle Haley in the Supporting Actor category.
I think these are the best nominations/winners I’ve seen in any site. Congratulations, but I would have thrown some nominations for The Prestige, at least best Director.
Dtpena: Thank you! By the way, Nolan is a good choice. I didn’t see the film, but I heard terrific things about his direction in it. Even without seeing it, I would be willing to strike Scorcese from the list and replace him with Nolan … I really was disappointed with Scorcese’s direction for “Departed”
lol, oh yeah I missed that.
Would you say he was a supporting actor in the movie? I’m in two minds about it because he does get a hell of a lot screen time and at times it’s his narrative the film follows.